YMCA parent tips: beating the frantic family syndrome

Today's families are busier than ever before. Juggling schedules can be very stressful, especially if one or both parents work outside of the home. Combine one working parent (always in a rush) with one busy child (marching to his own tune) and you may find tempers flaring, tears falling and misery coming from all directions.

Here are some tips to get the whole family up and moving-together and on time.

Connect with your children.

When you say you're in a hurry, your child might interpret it as meaning that your thoughts are elsewhere. And you can bet he'll do his best to bring your attention back to him. Dawdling may not always be a deliberate attempt to defy you. It may be your child's attempt to reassure himself that you're still there for him.

Take time to do at least one unhurried activity before you leave home, and then again when you next get back together

In the morning, you might talk about a dream your child had the night before. In the evening, you can each share what happened during the day. Include your child when you're cooking-work together side by side. Informal chats you find yourself having can make everyone feel closer.

Respect each other's needs.

Kids don't like to be interrupted or ordered around any more than you do. It's important that you respect your child's need to have some control. Remember, young children are tied to the present. Planning doesn't come naturally for them. Give them advance warning, using words they can understand. Be specific about plans for the day-what will happen at what time.

When you want your child to finish an activity, look for a natural stopping point.

It could be finishing a drawing or reading to the end of a chapter. Give your child at least five minutes' notice before you have to head out the door.

If a child is very attached to a special toy, bring it along if possible.

Let a younger child bring his favorite blanket or stuffed animal.

Create schedules and routines.

Schedules keep families moving smoothly and help plan for what's to come. If the schedule needs to change, try to go over the changes with everyone in the morning or the night before.

Make weekends less structured than weekdays by scheduling fewer activities.

And be sure to build in at least an hour or two for yourself.

Leave enough time.

Allowing extra time to get to day care, work or school can make the difference between sanity and chaos. It also leaves room for the unexpected. Stagger your children's wakeup times so they can use the bathroom, get dressed and eat breakfast without feeling frazzled.

Get organized.

Plan ahead. Lay out clothes and fill lunch boxes, diaper bags and bags for work the night before. Keep items you need near the door to avoid last-minute searches.

Children need to be organized, too. Make tidying up his room a part of your child's everyday tasks. Get him to think the night before about what he'll need for the next day.

Set the right tone and keep priorities in perspective.

You are your child's model. Pick your battles carefully and set a good example. Are matching socks as big a deal as getting to school on time? Decide what's really important and what's not.

Always try to keep your sense of humor.

Nobody's perfect.